Microaggressions in Everyday Life

Let me tell you a piece of my mind about microaggressions

According to Dr. Derald Wing Sue, Professor of Psychology and Education from the Teacher College at Columbia University, microaggressions are brief everyday indignities that can be verbal, behavioral or environmental. These can also be intentional or unintentional. Usually microaggressions contain an insulting or belittling message. Microaggressions hidden messages often cause severe psychological stress and harm to their target, mainly because the attack comes from a place of a non-threat. In truth, they reflect a view of inclusion versus exclusion, inferiority and superiority; one group is better than the other. These perspectives on diversity often happen outside our level of awareness… We are conditioned to think, repeat and use microaggressions (Laureate Education, Inc., 2011).

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I want to share how I have witnessed microaggressions in my everyday life. I have not only been a target for microaggressions, but I have used a few of them myself: 

I have heard repeatedly how hot and spicy Latin women are. Media images of actresses like Sofia Vergara and Jennifer Lopez help to promote this message. Maybe it can be perceived as a compliment, but it also gives a hidden message of Latinas as objectified beauties. Not to mention perpetuates a terrible stereotype of having bad tempers. 

I once told a dear friend she was really good with money, because of her Jewish heritage. At the time it was meant as a joke, but it was not received well, and it should not have been. The hidden message was that Jewish people are frugal, a terrible stereotype with negative connotations.

I told another high school friend he was quite articulate for an African American. He responded with a remark about how he makes it a point to not use slang and pronounce the words properly. This was awful to have put him in this position. I unintentionally marginalized his abilities and undermined him for his ethnicity.

I often used the term “third world” to refer to the developing nations, and now I can see how offensive this can be perceived. No one should be referred to as a less than human or as a second class citizen. We are all citizens of this world.

Here comes the conclusion... 

My least favorite microaggression is the use of the word ‘gay’ as a derogatory insult:

“You’re so gay, stop being a sissy” “That shirt is gay” “That band is so gay” etc. I’m sorry but no inanimate object has a sexual preference, yet the adjective gay seems to be used quite freely.

Unless you are referring to a person who is a homosexual; or using the word as in the adjective of happy/cheerful, please do not use the word gay. It is just plain wrong. 

Sadly at school my child was lectured by her classmates for saying her mom is gay. They said she was naughty for using a “bad” word about her mother. <<Gasp>> How could she?

Obviously these children are ignorant, being educated through narrow minded perspectives. There is no insult from the word ‘gay.’ It is the way is implemented that is negative and can become a microassault, an intentional form of microaggression. As parents and educators we need to be prepared to change and educate our children. Let’s start by becoming aware ourselves about the microaggressions we currently use. 

What microaggressions have you used? What microaggressions have you been a target of? Sharing will create awareness and bring to light the hidden messages.

Thanks for reading & sharing!

Angie

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References

Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer). (2011). Microaggressions in everyday life [DVD]. Perspectives on diversity and equity. Baltimore, MD: Author.